New Girl in Town: This ‘Bachelorette’ is Still Single
On this season of The Bachelorette, Ali Fedotowsky tries her hand at love with men from all over the United States and Canada attempting to edge their way into her heart.
And we wonder -- why it is so hard to snag a man these days?
I once tried to date several men at the same time without them knowing each other existed; they were all equally offended when they found out the truth.
So I wonder if the error of my ways involved the secrecy of it all. Perhaps, I should have dated them all at once and let them each know. I am sure those relationships would have become lasting ones.
Don’t get me wrong, I am just as guilty. I rush to any Bachelorette party I can find. By that, I mean, the parties that begin at 8 pm on Mondays, if not before. Women gather, eat, make predictions on who prince charming will be and critique Ali’s every move and hair flip.
My current Bachelorette party includes married, single and engaged women. A few are dating seriously and others just dating around. But we all make time to spend two hours each Monday imagining if we had 25 men vying for our attention, doing whatever it takes to accept a rose from us.
Men usually do not find this show particularly entertaining. And I understand why. We have all seen the person we like, like someone else. It is particularly difficult to be confident in your relationship with a person, when in the next scene, they are making out with another.
Part of the show that really involves the audience are the many exotic dates Ali and her date get to take. Women often wonder, “Why can’t I be there?” It is so easy to look at Ali sitting on the Hollywood sign hill, or tight rope walking across buildings. But I wonder, can you really get to know someone when you are distracted by something much more amazing going on?
For example, if I were to tight rope across a building, I would be much too worried about getting across than getting to know the person by my side.
TV and movies give us a false sense of what is real love. Take a look at the statistics: in Bachelorette history, only one of the five previous bachelorettes has turned her made-for-TV relationship into marriage.
The point of dating someone is to find someone to spend your life with, without the pressure and stress of other people being involved. Getting to know someone over a season of a TV show will not accurately portray who that person is.
Finding someone to share your life with is hard enough without ploys of show producers to cause more drama. Take for example the 2009 season with Jillian Harris, where country singer wannabe, Wes, claimed to have a girlfriend back home and used the show to get famous.
He did get famous, but became America’s in-house jerk and no woman would want his CD after that. Many times, The Bachelorette simply tries too hard to make romance more dramatic than it already is.
I will be watching every Monday to see who Ali eliminates, but I won’t get caught up wondering why it can’t be me choosing between 25 men. When the season ends, and the magazines stop caring about who Ali will choose, like most other contestants, she will probably end up alone.
I wish Ali the best, but finding love can’t be deduced to a spectacle for the American population to enjoy. In the end it is all about ratings. Like the rest of us trying to find love, Ali would be better served seeing where life takes her, instead of letting producers of The Bachelorette dictate her path.